What Is True Dependence?

Last night God really laid on my heart how dependent I am upon my own planning, intelligence, abilities, etc. If there is a way, I will make it happen; that's just the type of person that I am. That being said, I have a very difficult time letting go of control. If at all possible, I like to be the gal in the driver's seat.

Unfortunately for me, that is not how the Christian life works. The Bible calls me, as a Christian, to a life of total dependence on Christ. 1 Chronicles 16:11 says, "Look to the LORD and His strength; seek His face always." This verse clearly states the attitude I am supposed to have in every circumstance; whether it be a trail or a happy time, whether I'm stressed or relaxed, I am called to trust and believe in my Heavenly Father no matter what happens to be going on in my life.

Dependence is not just spiritual, either. Dependence is an everyday conscious decision that affects every aspect of your life, including physical, psychological, emotional, and financial. Being dependent on God means letting go of everything else. Lord, help me to let go.

Proverbs 3:5-6, "Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make straight your paths."

Waiting on the World to Change

Today I was driving and listening to John Mayer and one of his most popular songs came on: "Waiting on the World to Change." As I'm singing along to every word (his voice sounds like heaven's angels come down to Earth) I caught on to one key line that says, "It's not that we don't care, we just know that they fight ain't fair so we keep waiting for the world to change."

I've sung along to this song hundreds of times but this is the first time I really heard those lyrics. For the first time, I actually listened to those words and let them sink in. These lyrics have a sound of despair and acceptance. It's almost as if Mayer is saying "We care but we can't actually do anything about it so we'll just wait around for things to get better."

It's easy to be resigned to acceptance in today's world. A pretty common word that gets thrown around these days is "destiny;" whatever happens, happens, and there's nothing you can do about it. Our call according to Scripture; however, is much different. 2 Timothy 1:7 says, "For God has not given us a spirit of timidity, but of power and love and discipline."Being complacent just because the world says we can't accomplish something isn't the right attitude to have. The Bible say that anything is possible with God.

So stop spending your weekends sitting at home! Quit wasting your time watching 25 hours of TV a week. Find something you're good at and do it! God has given each of us unique talents that can be used for His kingdom, and it is our responsibility to use them for His glory and His fame. Rather than be resigned to acceptance and complacency, get up and do something!

1 Timothy 4:14a, "Do not neglect the gift you have."

To Break Every Chain

Tonight was too good for words, but I'll still try my best to relay how amazing it was as best as I can. Worshipping with hundreds of college students at ECHO tonight took me back to Passion: the hands outstretched towards the Lord, students kneeling in reverence of His glory, and the joy in the words as we all sang His praise. The atmosphere tonight was completely, totally, 100% God. It was truly incredible.

One song we sang tonight said, "There is power in the name of Jesus to break every chain." I cannot begin to express how relevant these words are in my life. Time and time again I have fallen, but those slips and those chains of sin and doubt are nothing compared to the surpassing greatness and strength of my God and Father Jesus Christ! There is power in His name to break MY chains, and He did.

God is so good and so faithful. Even when I fail, He prevails. Even when I fall, He stands strong. When I prove myself imperfect over and over, He proves Himself perfect in His love, grace, and kindness. The depth of His love cannot be measured. His grace cannot be defined by the number of souls that will be with Him in eternity (although that would be a very large number). He cannot be expressed or explained by any human words or thoughts, and yet He has given us the great privilege to know Him and to love Him.

I am overwhelmed by the goodness of God. He has broken my chains, He has set me free, and He has made me alive in Christ. Though I once was dead in my trespasses, He brought me to life with His love and compassion. By His wounds I have been healed.

As I bask in God's incredible mercy, I am reminded of my failure to show His glory to my mission field: my friends, my campus, and my family. "Come awake, come and rise up from your grave!" No greater love will be found than that of Christ Jesus our Lord. No gift will be bought that is of greater value than the precious blood of Christ and redemption for our sins. He is worth my everything; He is worth my all.

John 5:25, "Most assuredly, I say to you, the hour is coming, and now is, when the dead will hear the voice of the Son of God; and those who hear will live."

The Switch

It's the second day of the semester and today is a completely different story than yesterday. Thank the Lord for that.

I woke up this morning and immediately went to work. After two hours, I had only gotten through the homework for one class. Needless to say I was completely overwhelmed. I called my mom to discuss ordering some books, and she said to me, "I want you to seriously pray about changing your major." That was the breaking point.

I couldn't handle it anymore. Business is something I'm great at, but do I enjoy it? Not really. I broke down. It was like my whole life was crashing down. I had the perfect plan but it was falling down around me and there was absolutely nothing I could do about it. (On a side-note, I love my mom. She came home early from work just to go to Reinhardt with me and meet with the Dean of the Price School of Education. It really meant a lot to me.)

At 11:30 my mom and I sat down with Dr. Curry to talk about the possibility of me becoming an education major. Praise the Lord, he even subbed some of my classes to make sure I got the most out of my courses. In the long run, I changed majors. Yes, folks, I am officially an early childhood education major. Granted I'm going to lose quite a few credit hours, but I love kids. All my spare time is spent with kids. This is a major I love.

Colossians 3:23, "Work willingly at whatever you do, as though you were working for the Lord rather than for people."

Strength In My Weakness

I am stressed beyond belief right now. Everything went wrong today; I'm on the verge of tears just thinking about it. This morning I was enrolled in six classes, but by this afternoon I was only enrolled in five. Seeing the homework load just after one class session (and I only got through four classes before I dropped that class!) convinced me that it'd be too much.

On top of that, I already have homework in EVERY class. It's only the first day back! Two of my classes have homework assigned over Spring Break. First of all, it's called a break for a reason. Secondly, I won't even be in the country! When I talked to my professor (who also happens to be my advisor) about it, she informed me that I would be able to catch up that Sunday evening when I get back from India. WHAT?! Like the first thing I want to do when I get home is catch up in Human Resource Management.

I can't do this. I'm so overwhelmed. This isn't how school should be. I'm just so tired of trying to get by.

All I can do is pray for strength. Without His intervention, I will fail. Please, Lord, give me strength.

Exodus 15:2a, "The Lord is my strength and my defense; He has become my salvation."

Beneath the Surface

My friend, Michelle (shout out!), and I are going through the book of Colossians together, and today was the first day. We are each reading a chapter each day, and we meet on Tuesdays to discuss what we read and what we felt like the Lord was showing us through the Scripture. Today was the first day, so I read Colossians 1.

Initially, I blew threw it in a couple minutes haphazardly, not paying much mind to the theology of it at all. Upon reading it a second time, I underlined a few key words: redemption (vs. 14), steadfast (vs. 23), and striving (vs. 29). What do you think these words mean?...

Redemption (Greek)- deliverance

Steadfast (Greek)- settled, morally fixed, firm in purpose

Striving (Greek)- fighting

Looking into the meanings of these words gave me such a deeper understanding of the passage. God delivered me from sin, I am to be grounded and firm in purpose, and I am called to fight for His working and will. 

Colossians 1:23a, "But you must continue to believe this truth and stand firmly in it."

What's To Come

As I let Passion ruminate in my mind, I began to realize what I'm truly good at: loving people. My friends mean more to me than I can verbalize, and loving on them in whatever way I can is what I am most passionate about. Whether it's Gatorade when they're sick or phone calls at 2am, I want to be the kind of friend they can rely on.

That being said, I am so excited for Passion 2013 (no, the apocalypse will not be in 2012, for no man knows the hour or the day)! During Passion this year, I thought of several friends who I wished were there to experience the atmosphere of 40,000+ college students seeking after the heart of God. The more I pondered these girls and discussed my heart with a close friend, the more I realized my need to reach out to these students. Starting today, I am saving; saving to take at least one of these girls with me to Passion 2013. It seems crazy, but nothing is impossible with God.

Philippians 4:13, "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."

Moderately Passionate Isn't Passionate At All

I'm not quite sure where to begin... These past few days at Passion 2012 have been pretty interesting. I wish I could say that they were revolutionary, life-changing, or indescribable; I really do. In all honesty, I don't feel very different (if different at all) than I did before Passion. Maybe that's my mistake. I'm pretty okay with where I'm at and that is not okay.

This morning Louie spoke about how we all want to know what "God's will" for our lives (like it can actually be defined and written on a fortune cookie; as if God were some finite being we could actually begin to fathom and grasp) when in actuality all we have to do is be loving and bold. Louie said one phrase that I liked a lot: "Do what you're good at." God has put me exactly where I need to be and given me all the talents I need to do His work. My job is merely to honor HIm with those talents in all that I do. Being satisfied with complacency is not an option.

Proverbs 1:32b, "Fools are destroyed by their own complacency."

Numero Uno

It is officially 2012. Every new year so many people make resolutions that they never keep. Something about the new year just feels like a fresh start; a clean slate. I can totally relate to that; last year I made some very bad mistakes that had some steep consequences. I wandered away from God and the church, and I became one with the world.

Looking back on my failures can be extremely painful, but my failures are also a reminder of God's perfect grace. Even when I was at my worst, He loved me. Even though I didn't deserve it, He forgave me. Even though I disobeyed His law, He called me His own. It blows my mind that even when I was away from God and living in sin, He still cared for me. This year, I won't make the same mistakes. This year, I won't live with regrets. This year is a fresh start, and this year I will live to honor Him.

Romans 4:7, "Blessed are those whose lawless deeds have been forgiven, and whose sins have been covered."